Monday, May 29, 2006

Am I dreaming?

"I drove my car around and suddenly I got lost. I didn't know where I was. The street, the buildings that I was in didn't look familiar. What was the date? Did I go to work? What time was it? I asked these questions to myself. I was in a state of great confusion. While I was down the street, I felt like to provoke something but then I hesitate because I was not sure I was really in a dream. The street was crowded with people and cars, and it looked very real to me. I walked and asked a lady whether the street that we were in was Colima Road, she pointed to the street next to it.

I somehow went to bed again. When I got up, I noticed there was another couple sleeping next to my bed. At that moment, I started to realize that I must be in a dream. I tested by getting up and looking at my bedspread. Yep, I was dreaming and starting to wake up."

With all the wishes that I have about lucid dreaming, my mind must have struggled along the conscious and unconscious portion in my dreaming state. I was in a semi-conscious state when I was not sure I was dreaming, but at the same time, I was questioning the validity of the dream content. A paradox indeed!

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Oneness with all ?

Ever since I walked this path, I read hundreds of books about the nature of our universe and mankind's ultimate destiny. They basically echoed the same universal thought of our oneness with God and oneness with all beings and all things. I am not challenging these exalted higher wisdom. They might be well and true.

But how in the world can we truly live, think and act that way? I have been meditating for over five years, I have not been able to really bring this philosophy ingrained into my being and live, think and act in accordance with this ageless wisdom.

Just recently, I visited Blockbuster video rental store, a gentleman presented a very good deal from Blockbuster. With about seventeen dollars a month, if I join the online video rental program, I will have a full month membership free and I can rent three videos at a time and unlimited rental. Sounds great! My mind started to calculate how I can take advantage of this deal without ever paying the fees. I can have at least 2nd and 3rd season's "24" series by renting in the first month, copying them and sending them back as fast as I can, and the good deal got better and better in my mind until I stopped myself in the track. "What are you doing ?" I asked myself. "With all the training of metaphysics, don't you realize that when you take advantage of others, you are actually taking advantage of yourself? Where is the notion of oneness with all?"

I admire the exalted ancient wisdom, but for unrealized majority of mankind, it is not an easy task to always live with this ultimate truth. Until we reach a stage of profound inner direct experience of oneness, it would only be an ideal wisdom for us to aspire to.

Sunday, May 21, 2006


Last night, my son was away from home, visiting his friends in Palm Spring, a two-hour drive. I went to bed about 11:45 pm. In the middle of night, I was about to awake, and thought it was about 5:00 am, my usual time to meditate. Suddenly I heard a female voice calling my Chinese name in my head. I was startled to get up with an uneasy feeling. The voice was crisp clear, and had a sense of urgency. I could not make out who's voice was that, but clearly it was not my son's voice. I felt a bit relieved. I looked at the alarm, it was only 1:45 am. I felt I have slept all night.

About 4:50 am, I got a real phone call from James that he was on the way home. Somehow I sensed that he will come home during the night, I deliberately did not lock the door to our car garage before going to bed.

I remember several years ago, I had what they call, "the beginner's luck". I was in an intense self discovery and self examination mode. Whenever I had some issue with others that I like to resolve, the situation will present itself so that I have the opportunity to talk it over and clear it in my consciousness.

One time, I had a new neighbor just moved in and she did not know our rule of parking the car. Many times she will park the car in a way that whoever parked inside my garage would have difficult time backing it out. I was very patient for a little while. Then one day, I was driving home from work and decided that it was time to clear the situation. At the time I had not even got the chance meeting my new neighbors. The chance had it that, as soon as I approached my front door, I saw my neighbors, a mother and a daughter standing right there talking. Well, it was a golden opportunity for me to welcome them to our neighborhood and clear the parking situation. After that, we have no more parking problem. The amazing thing is that the day that I decided to clear the parking situation, my neighbors will be right there giving me the opportunity to straighten things out. Before that day, I had never saw them, and did not know how they looked like.

A year ago, I was driving home from work, I had a habit of turning on the classic music station 105.1. merrily listening to my music, completely oblivious of the traffic condition. But for some reason, I did not turn on the music that day and naturally I was more alert of my surrounding. I suddenly saw the engine temperature indicator flared up just a little, but then it started to climb. I was a little apprehensive because the traffic condition was impossible for me to stop on the freeway shoulder. I had to drive back home 8 miles, 35 minutes in heavy traffic. Suddenly a thought kicked in. "Turn the heater on to full power so that the heat in the engine can dissipate, that can prevent engine overheat". Somehow I had remembered this tactic that I learned more than 10 years ago. In the middle of blazing summer afternoon, I had my heater on full power and my car escaped the overheat condition. I was able to drive up to
Master Lube garage with the temperature indicator stayed constant in the mid point the whole time. I have my car for 15 years and never have the overheat experience. It is incredible that I remember the advice that I received more than 10 years ago from NPR's radio broadcast of "Car Talk" . In the emergency situation like this, I was able to tap into this piece of knowledge in a nick of time.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

A field of maple leaves in the sky - A Mind Travel experience

Ever since I have been using "Gateway Experience" in my lunch hour meditation, I've tried to incorporate what I have learned in my morning meditation. In the middle of this morning's meditation, I got an inspiration and thought to myself, "why not expand my consciousness from focus 10 to focus 12 and see what happens!"

When I did that, my focus shifted on the space above my head. While it stayed there, I imagined the space encompasses the entire universe. About thirty minutes later, the alarm blared, I terminated meditation and went back to my short recess. While I lied down, I experienced my first astral travel since November of 2005.

I first sensed my consciousness spiral upward and outward toward the space in my room. It was dark and I could not see anything. Then I floated toward my bedroom window out into the sky. I saw a massive field of maple leaves scatter in the sky. I thought to myself that it was too dark. As if the astral world could respond to my thought, the sky started brighten up to a clear blue. I floated in and out of the room several times and gradually the scene faded.

I noticed that the energy field of my etheric body was much denser than what I had experienced. I used to not feel anything when I floated out of the wall or window of my room, but this time I felt a prickly sensation when passing through . The energy density were different between wall and me, hence I felt a slight resistent sensation while I was floating out of it.

Another observation is that the room that I thought I floated in and out was not really my bedroom. It was much larger and I could not identify the similar furnishing as in my real bedroom.

So, where did I travel to, you may ask? There is no maple tree outside of my bedroom window. Since etheric body energy field is in different frequency than a physical one, so the etheric travel is to alternate reality entirely unlike the physical one. I have been many places that I could not identify in my surrounding physical environment while astral travel. Let's just say that this universe of ours is truly a mystery waiting for our exploration and discovery.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Complete nonsense - A dream

"I was working on my computer with many applications open. When I pushed one button, a strange thing happened, one by one each window was closed one after another and then computer shut down by itself. This happened several times, and I suddenly realized that this never happen in real life, I was dreaming. Unfortunately, I woke up at that moment."

Sometime before I fully woke up, I got another strange dream

"I saw a lot of supposedly my coworkers lining up to enter an auditorium. Most of them had a plate of roasted meat on it. They walked in and seated. I did not know there was an event in my company, and I was curious where they got their food. Inside the Auditorium was dark, and every one is anticipating some kind of performance coming up.

But I could not find any familiar faces to ask about food that they had. So, I walked and looked around, then I saw two people engaging in animated discussion of some kind, and they looked somewhat familiar to me so I asked them. One of them told me that food came from the instruction given by the company. Here was the instruction, every one supposed to walk straight out from their house, making a left turn about 10 fts. And right turn for may be another 10 fts, then we should see a shop that made the food that we ordered."

A weird dream indeed! These dreams were perfect for a conscious mind to recognize the strangeness and impossibility of two events. But I failed to recognize them. The dreams were totally making sense to my subconscious mind.

A dream state could be analogous to our after life state. For ordinary people (like me), I had no control of its content and its course of action. I assume, once we shed our physical body, our conscious mind will then be blended into our subconscious mind. Subconscious becomes a commander, we will no longer be able to censor what will be played out. It is very much like a cork in the roaring ocean wave. I used to believe that mastering lucid dream is just a sideline of genuine spirituality. It is unimportant, a distraction to the sure thing. I am not so sure that is true any more. For what I have studied lately, taking control of our dream state is a perfect practice for taking control of our after life when we will be in Astral body.

Am I dreaming?

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

A Glimpse of The Bhagavad Gita

It is fortunate that I have the opportunity to read "The Bhagavad Gita" translated by Eknath Easwaran . This literary masterpiece is considered the most influential and the most luminous of all the Hindu Scriptures.

In this trying time, I found wisdom and knowledge from the Gita comforting my deep troubled soul. After reading several enlightening chapters, my heart started to open and all the sorrow and grief of the past were replaced by the cheerfulness and a profound sense of calm. I have found refuge in the ancient wisdom of the Gita.

Once more I have been touched and reminded of the truth and divine nature of our existence. In the midst of my own guilt and sorrow I had forgotten what I have learned. I have fallen into the ordinary mind full of shrouded illusions of the world. The true aspirant sees God in everyone and in everything regardless what kind of situation he (she) is in. The Gita emphasis the detachment of emotional roller coaster ride which is typical of people who are ignorant of their grand nature. The Gita instructed us to have no attachment of fruit and outcome of our labor and service. Our job is to perform our duties, fulfill our obligations at the best of our abilities and not to be concerned about the reward or punishment that go with it.

Yes, enjoy the world of illusions but do not get tangled up with its web.